my best-self

I'm just finishing my last shows of the year up. it seems I've had less time to write and put my words on to paper in these last months. the hurried-ness  of things to be done and future plans to be met. makes for little time to just sit and stare at the blank page. i decided to write on my blog instead of in my journal. same thing but different.
my heart is full of so many different things, like dreams, love, prayers, people, assignments, goals, the past, the future,  the present, gratitude, fear, happiness, tears, joy... so on and so forth.
it all builds up and i have to get it out. so that can take it slowly and clearly.
i just finished a show for the weekend here in Charlotte, it was long and hot and good and fulfilling, (now that it is over.)
 I'm barley able to get myself right into production mode this morning which is why my mind to fingers are working better with just sitting and writing.
I said to myself that this is the last show that I am doing for a while. like for a year. but then i think come April i will have the desire to be out in the sunshine and to see the folks that smile when they see me and my art.
as i work here in my studio it is very quiet and lots of thoughts that are tossed around daily but only in my own mind. it gets stir crazy after a while and i need an outlet of a mass of people that i can sit and stare, while they walk around looking at pretty things.
it always seems I'm at my best-self after a show. all the hard work has paid off and i have that huge task off my list. i get to sit back and reflect and take in so much of what just happened. it keeps me occupied for a moment. the moment which is just like it sounds very short and quick. and then its back to basics. the grind of whats next. but that moment is what my success to me looks like.  and that is what i go after to keep me going. alive.
 thank you to all who attributed and attribute to my moments. my success. my life.
until then i will be here building up for the next time. take care. xoxoxo