im always trying to figure out things...so many things that i cant begin to give a list.  i usually get frustrated because i think im on to something then i cant get it to unfold and become real.  so then i just go back to the usual hum drum of what i do everyday. (not always but most of the time) there will be a breakthrough where some of my ideas will shine through....

the other day we were talking about passion and how the definition of passion has the words obsession in it.  and i started thinking those of us that have passions, its kind of like an obsession, addiction, we are like always searching to better our passion, over thinkers, etc. at least that is how me and some of my fellow colleagues are with our art, we pretty much drive our selves crazy with our passion.  its not necessarily that having a passion is some zen thing to have. its like some of these passionate people are just crazed deep inside with trying to flourish and grow and be.......its like a never ending constant thinking process of how to get this passion out.

i sometimes feel sad when i ask someone what there passion is and they say they don't know. i now can see they must be very calm and content....ha ha.

but i would have it no other way. its like we thrive these on things called stress and compulsion and addiction.....because when its not there we are longing for it.  so what can i say. i suppose we all just need to stick together so we can all be there for one another.  take care. back to the drawing board.


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